Monday, December 12, 2011

The First (and hopefully last) Things I Will Ever Write About "Twilight"

Okay, I will admit, I haven't read the books and I haven't seen the movies and I doubt I ever will because there is one, big, huge flaw at the heart of the series that I just can't swallow....

A 150 year-old vampire going to high school.


Seriously, and be honest... strip off the rose colored glasses of your past... would you REALLY, WILLINGLY, go back to your high school days? The peer pressure, the cliques, the judgementalism... is that something you'd want to experience again?

Not to mention the fact that, after 150 years one would hope that Edward would have spent at least part of that time actually, you know, studying and learning stuff. If I was ever granted immortality I would probably take to learning about darn near anything just to stave off the boredom. Economics? Done. Law? I'd be freakin' Perry Mason with fangs. Literature? I'd quote War and Peace from memory. You get the picture. And that's not counting the common sense and "street smarts" one would pick up after 150 years. How much do you think you'd learn about plain, old, human nature after all that time?

Compared to that high school would be a mind-numbing SLOG! Heck, I doubt many people could stand to sit through a high school class after being out of high school for even ten years!

So, yeah, Twilight officially lost me right from the opening premise. I don't care if it's an "epic romance" or not. Anyone who would willingly subject themselves to high school over and over again is a putz.

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