Grab Bag Reviews: "The Ghosts of N-Space"

Doctor Who "died" in 1989 when the show was officially put on hiatus but for all practical purposes cancelled. Like a monster in a horror movie though it kept rising from its grave.... Only without all the gore. Or the slaughtering of sexually active teenagers. And with the Doctor not being a monster. Or evil.... Okay, so it isn't the best metaphor but you get the drift.

In 1993 Barry Letts, who had been producer for most of Jon Pertwee's tenure, was tapped to write a whole new audio adventure. Here in America audio dramas had died out in the late 1940's to early 1950's as TV began to supplant radio. In Great Britain, however, the tradition held on and in fact is alive and very well still today. These are generally high-quality productions with full casts and audio effects which air on radio stations. For this 1993 story Letts adapted an idea he had for a Third Doctor script which was never produced in the 1970's. The finished audio drama was title "Paradise of Death" and featured Jon Pertwee, Elizabeth Sladen, and Nicholas Courtney all reprising their roles as the Doctor, Sarah Jane Smith and Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart respectively.

The story proved popular enough that Letts ended up writing a second audio drama, "The Ghosts of N-Space" which was broadcast in 1995. Again Pertwee, Sladen and Courtney reprised their roles. It would be the last time Pertwee played the Doctor as he would pass away several months later.

Both of these audio stories were supposed to be set during Pertwee's original run in the 1970's -- somewhere between the TV stories "The Time Warrior" and "Planet of the Spiders". "The Ghosts of N-Space" can be further pinpointed as taking place somewhere between "Death to the Daleks" and "Planet of the Spiders" since Sarah Jane mentions recently running up against the Daleks here.

The Plot: The Brigadier takes some personal time when he is summoned to Italy by a distantly related uncle. Upon arrival he learns that the uncle, owner of a small island off the coast of Sicily and the Castillo on the island, is having trouble from an American mob boss, Max Vilmio, who wants the island and everything on it and will stop at nothing to get it. The Brig also discovers that the Castillo is haunted by a ghost and now plagued by demonic creatures! Concerned, the Brig calls the Doctor to come and investigate.

Meanwhile, Sarah Jane Smith, deciding to give up journalism and write a novel, has traveled to Italy with her friend and former co-worker Jeremy Fitzoliver. When she spies the Brig she and Jeremy decide to follow him and soon become embroiled in the events at the Castillo.

The Doctor discovers that sometime in the past someone opened a rift between our dimension and a limbo dimension known as N-Space. N-Space is populated by demonic creatures and the spirits of the dead who do not "cross over". He reveals that they need to uncover when the rift was first opened and seal it otherwise it will soon open wide and unleash the demonic denizens of N-Space into the world.

As the Doctor and Sarah Jane travel back and forth in time they uncover tragic events in the Castillo's past and learn that Vilmio is more than what he seems and far more dangerous than could ever be imagined. Simultaneously, in the present, the Brig, his uncle, Jeremy, and a rag-tag group of defenders try to prepare for an attack by Vilmio and his men. If they fail the consequences will be catastrophic.

My Take: I really do hate to say something bad about a Doctor Who story. I'm no Precious Pollyanna but I usually try to offer constructive criticisms or at least find some good amidst something bad but THIS story... Oh, this is one of the worst stories ever written. Where do I start?!

As an audio drama there are no sets, costumes, camera work or visual effects to critique. On the flip side, though, voices are key to a good audio production. And the voices here are not great.

Pertwee does a good job and, surprisingly, age has not taken a really noticeable toll on his voice. There are a few places where one can tell his voice is not quite what it was but those moments are few and far between. Sladen, likewise, does a solid job although a few times she really over-plays a scene. Courtney, like Pertwee, does not seem to suffer too badly from age and he turns in a very even performance.

That, however, is the last of the good that can be said about the voices. The actor playing the Brig's uncle puts on the most broad, over-the-top, stereotypical Italian accent I've heard outside of Chico Marx.... only Chico was funny.

Also, I had actually thought it was impossible to create a really offensive American accent... I no longer think that. This story doesn't just produce one it produces TWO! Max Vilmio is a children's cartoon villain -- a caricature of a 1930's mobster and as such he cannot be taken seriously and never becomes much of a real threat. He's certainly not the calibre of the usual Doctor Who villains. The second bad accent award goes to the actress playing Vilmio's girlfriend, Maggie. Her also cartoonish, stereotypical, Brooklyn accent just grates on your nerves after 5 seconds. The other voice actors are not bad, just either really too earnest or too bland.

And then there is the script. Urg. The script... First of all, the characters just don't work as a whole. Vilmio, as I stated, never really becomes the menace he's supposed to be. Most of the 'tragic' characters in the past are either fluff-brained idiots or cardboard cut-outs so it is impossible to feel anything for their fate even though we are obviously supposed to. Fitzoliver, who Letts introduced in "Paradise of Death" is a perfect little idiot who is obviously meant to provide some comic relief... but of course he isn't funny and the script itself is so unintentionally funny it doesn't NEED comic relief. Most of the characters are as thin as paper dolls and the little depth we get is more like a 'drive by shooting' characterization. For example, there is a moment between Maggie and Jeremy after Maggie saves his life and we learn about her tragic, abusive childhood and the fact that she has long lived with the uncertain guilt that she might have caused the death of her abusive father. And then very quickly the moment is over, nothing more is said about the incident and Maggie's characterization doesn't change at all.

Even the regular cast does not fare too well as the independent-minded Sarah Jane Smith becomes a bit too much of an old-fashioned female companion with quite a bit of screaming, overemotionalism, and a ridiculous amount of reliance on the Doctor for everything. The Doctor spouts nonsense that is too much like spiritualism for the scientific Doctor. The Brigadier, someone who was usually skeptical of the Doctor's scientific theories, here swallows a load of guff that more like magic than science.

And that brings us to another problem. As I've said before, Doctor Who has long played more in the realm of science-fantasy than science-fiction but this story throws out the 'science' part of the science-fantasy and gives us pure fantasy. Oh, Letts makes some half-hearted attempt to dress things up in a little technobabble but it is thin and doesn't work at all. No matter what the whole story is filled with ghosts, poltergeists, alchemists, demons, hell, purgatory, and astral projection. I've got nothing against such subject matter in fiction... but it doesn't belong in Doctor Who plain and simple and it especially doesn't belong in a Third Doctor story.

The Italian setting serves no real purpose as it does not seem to add anything to the story and, aside from the Brig's Uncle Mario and a couple of supporting characters everyone else is either a terrible American or sounds a proper Brit. Plus, the script has to jump through hoops to give the Brig, a proud Scotsman, an Italian uncle.

There are also entirely too many coincidences. Huge points of the plot revolve around coincidences and Letts even tries to cover for these by introducing the ideas of serendipity and synchronicity to the story but it doesn't work. The amount of conveniences and coincidences required to make everything work stretch credulity until it snaps like a 20 year-old rubber band and on top of that it smacks of lazy or uninspired writing.

And, as a personal nitpick, there is a little swearing here which is just disconcerting because it doesn't feel like it suits the rest of the story. There is also a point where Vilmio calls Maggie a "dumb polack" in an ethnic slur which really goes beyond the pale.

Audio drama should have been a perfect fit for something like Doctor Who since it allows a script to be unfettered by the limitations of budget and special effects. A simple basic description and the listener can let their own imagination create the costumes and the sets and the special effects -- it's the cheapest type of production imaginable, the human mind is. And this, in particular, should have been a treat by bringing together Pertwee, Courtney and Sladen twenty years after they left the roles and giving fans an extra dose of the Third Doctor. Instead it all falls apart and dissolves into a mess. There is an extra layer of disappointment here as well since it was Pertwee's last turn as the Doctor. One can't help but wish he had gone out on a triumphant note.

Unless you are an ultra-fan or a completist it is best to just skip this story. Since the story has never officially been recognized as Doctor Who canon it's safe to just pretend like "The Ghosts of N-Space" never existed.

Grab Bag Reviews: "The Talons of Weng Chiang"

There is a saying: "Do one thing and do it right". Well, in a way, the era of producer Philip Hinchcliffe and script editor Robert Holmes was about that. After the Third Doctor's era in which social and political issues were tackled under the guise of entertaining sci-fi stories Hinchcliffe had steered the show away from that model with his updating of old, classic, Gothic horror stories. There were few overt statements about class or environmentalism here -- instead playing up the frights and the atmosphere and the characters themselves.

Hinchcliffe had decided, though, to move on at the end of season 14 and Holmes was looking to leave as well. As such, these two long-time collaborators decided to pull out all the stops for their final story.

After the original writer had to pull out Hinchcliffe encouraged Holmes to write the story and also encouraged him to do what he wanted with it and spare no expense. If this was to be their swan song then they wanted it to be a good one....

The Plot: The Doctor and his companion, Leela, arrive in London in the late 1800's but are quickly embroiled in a police investigation. Young women are going missing and the Doctor soon finds clues which lead him to Chinese stage magician Li H'sen Chang. Li H'sen Chang, however, is a follower of a mythical, powerful and terrible Chinese god called Weng Chiang... and the Doctor begins to suspect that Weng Chiang may not be as mythical as he's been painted... at least in this time and this place.

My Take: "The Talons of Weng Chiang" is.... a troublesome episode. Not because it's bad but because it's good! Holmes pulled from a number of influences for this story -- including the Sherlock Holmes stories of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the Fu Manchu stories of Sax Rohmer, and even a touch of The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux and even a touch of My Fair Lady but it's the Sax Rohmer stuff that makes the story skate so close to the edge.

Rohmer is most commonly associated with "Yellow Peril" -- a kind of wave of Sinophobia that rolled through many Western nations -- in particular England and America in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. It was originally spawned by fears that Chinese immigrants would take away jobs from the white, native population and would increase in numbers until they outnumbered the white population. Sound familiar? Yeah, we've been through this old song and dance a number of times but people never seem to learn. But I'm digressing.

Political cartoons, comic strips, books, and short stories all took turns at representing Chinese as evil, cold-blooded killers or masterminds. One of the most famous representations which has come down to us today is Fu Manchu. Most people have never read a Sax Rohmer Fu Manchu story and yet the term is still bandied about -- most notably in the name for a type of mustache. Rohmer's Fu Manchu, however, was of the "great criminal mastermind" type who ruled London's Limehouse district and always had his plots foiled by the white hero but who also always escaped to menace the world another day. We see elements of Fu in the original version of Flash Gordon's Ming the Merciless and the original version of the Iron Man villain the Mandarin.

To a modern audience, however, this sort of blatant racial stereotyping would be anathema. And that's part of where the problem comes in. Holmes wanted to re-create the feel of the Victorian era with as much authenticity as he could. This includes using some of the slang terms of the time as well as racial attitudes. And at the same time he was pulling from literature from the era and wanting to present a kind of snapshot of that too. What results is a story which depicts Chinese characters talking in a very stereotypical dialect and with some very stereotypical trappings but at the same time, it's a near perfect mimic of something from the Victorian period. So do we forgive it for being accurate? Do we make allowances for what Holmes was trying to do? Or do we think that he should, perhaps, have mitigated things more and presented a more cosmopolitan world view? Added to that is the fact that Li H'sen Chang was played by an Occidental actor in make-up. It's very good make-up but it doesn't change the fact that an Occidental is playing an Oriental... something that tends to quite understandably get people's hackles up. All of this would not be so bad if the rest of the story was just God-awful but it's not.

In defense of the story, though, Li H'sen Chang may begin as a stock character but he DOES become more nuanced as the story rolls on. He may be devoted to the being he believes to be Weng Chiang but he also has been entranced by his success on the stage. He takes pride in his magic act and the more acclaim and fame he receives the more he feels the pull between his place on the stage and his place by his master's side. In the end, his "god" punishes him for his failures in the worst way possible -- by ending his stage career. Chang also gets a rather moving death scene and, despite the fact that he has been a willing accomplice to multiple murders, the viewer feels sorry for him. In many ways he becomes yet another victim of Weng Chiang.

Putting aside the controversy of the story... there are some positive things about it. The companion of the time, Leela, was a "savage" from the future and was really the first ass-kicking female companion. Nearly fearless and a tough fighter, Leela often got herself out of any situations she got herself into. She also often was the one saving the Doctor's life. This story is no exception as, in one sequence, Leela throws a knife at the advancing living ventriloquist's dummy Mr. Sin and when that fails to stop him she jumps onto a table, runs across it and escapes from the room by doing a header out a window. And it is awesome. Leela also is untaught, not stupid, and that is clearly shown here as well as she quickly picks up on information from the time period. There is a also a touch of Eliza Doolittle as she transforms into an elegant lady for a night at the theatre.

In all of this actress Louise Jameson hits every not pitch perfect. Jameson makes all of Leela's various threats of violence absolutely believable and yet turns around and displays a shy side of the warrior as she prepares to embark on the unfamiliar world of polite society.

Tom Baker also puts in a much more subdued performance than usual. He even has a costume change, temporarily subsuming the bohemian look for a Holmesian inverness cape and deerstalker cap. While the Doctor's usual bits of whimsy are present they are not as overpowering as he takes the mystery seriously. It is something just enough out-of-usual to attract the attention of the audience and make the story something special.

And of course there are the characters of theatre owner Henry Gordon Jago and scientist Professor Litefoot. The two characters proved so popular that there were actually, for a time, rumors that the BBC was considering spinning them off into their own series. The bombastic Jago and the cautious Litefoot are such well-developed and charismatic characters that they really do steal the show. The two do not even meet until the very last episode but they are woven so well throughout the story that they seem a natural part of it all -- and perfect foils for one another. The actors in question -- Christopher Benjamin for Jago and Trevor Baxter for Litefoot -- inhabit the roles so fully it is impossible to imagine anyone else doing a better job. They manage to make the characters both larger-than-life and yet utterly human at the same time. In point of fact, there is a sequence in particular I love... Litefoot offers Leela some supper and is rather discombobulated when the young woman picks up a chunk of meat and just starts biting into it -- foregoing knife, fork and plate -- but rather then hurt her feelings or make her look foolish, Litefoot puts aside his own refinements and picks up another piece of meat and bites into it. It says volumes about Litefoot, his world view and yet at the same time his kind heart.

The story also really excells at the true villains. Weng Chiang is revealed as an impostor called Magnus Greel and Greel, like the Phantom of the Opera, is hideously disfigured. He's also mad as a hatter. At first his over-the-top ranting work well but after a little while they do go on too long and they start to become silly instead of threatening.

And then there is Mr. Sin. Holmes understood well that, in the hands of a talented comedian, a ventriloquist's dummy can be funny. The dummy itself, though, can be a creepy thing. The size of a small child and yet usually made to look like a human being there is always that faintly creepy feeling that the thing is watching you. Horror movies have long picked up on this and turned the dummy into a nightmare figure. Holmes, therefore gives us "Mr. Sin". At first an innocuous figure, it quickly moves into the realm of creepy and then goes on to full-on menacing. Mr. Sin was played here by Deep Roy, a well known and respected midget actor.

Tribute must also go to everything else about the story as well. There is some just absolutely gorgeous location shooting and the locations were chosen with care and add to the atmosphere and tone of the story. The costuming is also lovely -- in particular Li H'sen Chang's stage costumes -- ornately beaded affairs which are simply stunning. And even the special effects are pretty good here. The two exceptions are the "giant rats" in the sewers which are, alternately, real rats filmed on a miniature set and a hand puppet. Sadly the real rats look like rats on a miniature set and the hand puppet looks like a hand puppet. And neither is very threatening. Then there is a fight between the Doctor and Mr. Sin at the climax which is really sadly, embarrassingly, obviously Tom Baker wrestling with a large rag doll dressed as Mr. Sin.

One will not find deep commentary on class or environmentalism here but what one will find is a tightly woven story that seems to just fly by even at six episodes. There is mystery, danger, excitement, action, death, and near-death escapes but sadly there are also some elements which are uncomfortable to modern audiences and which do leave something of a blot on the story. I'll leave it to you, reader, to decide if this can be forgiven or whether it will be a deal-breaker.

Grab Bag Reviews: "Battlefield"

The Seventh Doctor's era was the swan song for the series for about 15 years (sort-of). The era had actually started somewhat badly with Colin Baker's tenure seeing ratings tumbling and Baker himself taking a lot of the heat for the failure. When Baker was fired from the job the production team sought out a new actor to play the Doctor. They found Sylvester McCoy -- a Shakespearean trained actor who happened, at the time, to be doing mostly a quasi-vaudeville revue. Originally his version of the Doctor was to be seen as somewhat befuddled -- dropping malapropisms everywhere. By the time "Battlefield" rolled around, however, this characterization was dropped for a version of the Doctor who used a disarming exterior to hide the fact that he was actually a master manipulator and schemer with something of a dark side. Sadly, ratings were still below where the BBC wanted them and there were those within the company who were sharpening their knives to cut it out no matter what.

At the time "Battlefield" was filmed the production team had heard rumblings that the series might be put on hiatus or even cancelled outright but they made the decision to continue on as if expecting to be renewed for the next season. At least they did for the most part. The opening sequence in the TARDIS is notably dark and sharp-eyed viewers will notice that there seems to be something wrong with the TARDIS walls. This is because the "walls" are, in fact, painted sheets. The set walls had been damaged and the production team opted not to have the expense of re-building them as the remaining scripts in the season didn't really call for much in the way of TARDIS interior shots.

As it happened, it was during the next story in production, "Survival" that the team learned that they would be allowed to finish out the season and then would be put on "hiatus". Most of the cast and crew believed that the so-called "hiatus" would be permanent. They were more or less right.

The story is also rather a tribute to the Third Doctor's era, with the inclusion of UNIT (United Nations Intelligence Task Force, complete with the blue berets this time), Brigadier Alistair Gordon Lethbridge-Stewart, and even the Third Doctor's yellow roadster nicknamed 'Bessie'.

The Plot: The Doctor and his young companion, Ace, receive a strange distress call and land on Earth sometime in the near future after 1988. Also summoned to Earth by the call are two groups of knights from a parallel dimension where the rise and fall of Camelot were rather more real. One group proves loyal to King Arthur while the other group are followers of the sorceress Morgaine. With a mixture of magic of futuristic technology these two forces pick a new battlefield and await the restoration of King Arthur. Adding to the commotion, a UNIT force is in the area trying to relieve a nuclear missile convoy which got off the road and bogged down near a lake. When the Doctor shows up UNIT immediately calls in a retired Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and he joins a new Brigadier -- Winifred Bambera. The forces in this war are small but the stakes are incredibly high. If the Doctor cannot stop the fighting then the planet itself may become a barren cinder.

My Take: I have to admit, when I was younger I thought "Battlefield" was a bit of a sub-par story. It seemed a bit too trite and a little too self-referential and self-reverent of the show's own past. Upon watching it again I find that I was more than a bit harsh on it.

I also have to say that the Seventh Doctor's era had the version of the theme song that I hate the most. It's too.... 'fiddly'.

It should be mentioned that this DVD comes with two copies of the episode -- the original as broadcast and a second version with some cut scenes added back in, enhanced visual effects and sound effects and all of the episode breaks taken out so the whole thing plays like a two-hour movie.

Getting down to brass tacks... The story itself is a mix of good and bad things. This new version of UNIT displays a rather conscious effort to put the U.N. in UNIT and while the diversity is nice it also feels a little bit forced with a French helicopter pilot, a Polish second-in-command, and at least one Czech officer as well. Fans were probably surprised to hear characters talking about "The Brigadier" and then not only NOT having Lethbridge-Stewart appear on the screen but have it actually be a black woman. Angela Bruce as Bambera is one of the best things about the new UNIT. She's tough and smart but without being annoying and is a shot in the arm for Women's equality. She also proves herself a capable leader and a capable warrior as well.

The plot is a bit of a mix and yet, somehow it all hangs together. It is a study on war and peace and honor in battle and yet manages to tack on an anti-nuclear polemic that actually works, as nuclear weapons are framed as a coward's weapon -- a killing without honor. There is also a sub-plot of the Doctor's future catching up with him. To the denizens from the alternate dimension the Doctor is known as "Merlin" but as the Doctor tells Ace, he is not Merlin... yet. But he might be someday. For now though, there are characters who know of his possible future while that future remains shrouded in mystery for him. It's a bit of the Timey-Wimeyness that Steven Moffat has gone back to in the recent series. On top of all that, the extended version of the story has another running plot of Ace and the Brigadier butting heads as Lethbridge-Stewart's old-fashioned attitude toward women tends to rankle Ace and she also feels that being the Doctor's companion is HER job now, not the Brig's.

The writer, Ben Aaronovitch, had intended to kill Lethbridge-Stewart in the story but in the end just couldn't do it. In a way this worked out for the best because fans have gotten to keep the old Brig around (and Courtney has reprised his role in a couple of Doctor Who audio stories as well as an episode of the spin-off series The Sarah Jane Adventures) and in addition it actually becomes a surprise. The foreshadowing of the Brig's death is so sledgehammer obvious that we expect it and then find the tables turned on us!

The dialogue has some real triumphs. Great, quotable lines and sequences with a real Shakespearean flair. There are also moments, though, when things fall down. There is a lot of name dropping of Third Doctor friends and enemies which serve no purpose in the story other than to have their names dropped. It seems very forced and awkward when it happens.

The characters are also, on the whole, a delight. Angela Bruce has great chemistry with Marcus Gilbert, the actor playing the knight Ancelyn, and Gilbert infuses the role with charm and humor... and he's pretty easy on the eyes too so there's that. Nicholas Courtney had reprised his role as the Brigadier twice during the Fifth Doctor's era and here he slips back into it as easily as putting on a comfortable pair of shoes. Jean Marsh, who was a Doctor Who veteran turns in a surprisingly unexpected turn as Morgaine. At times she is a straightforward baddie but then she can turn on a dime and transform Morgaine into a concerned parent or inject pathos into a scene so that we actually feel sorry for the character. The actor playing Mordred, though... well, he does the best he can with the role but many of his lines are written so very over-the-top and his part is nothing but a 2 dimensional villain without any of Morgaine's twists.

The regular cast of Sophie Aldred as Ace and Sylvester McCoy as the Doctor turn in great performances. In particular, Aldred does a good job at showing Ace making a friend in a girl close to her own age. It rather points up the normality of such friendships which Ace misses by traveling with the Doctor. McCoy, for his part, brings drama and gravitas and the ability to move easily from a lighthearted attitude to a man you would not want as your enemy.

I don't often mention the music but here I feel I must. Back in the early 1980's the production team dumped series composer Dudley Simpson in order to have all of the show's music produced by the BBC's Radiophonic Workshop -- which was primarily into electronic and synthesizer music. The stuff they create here is sometimes quite good but at other times it is entirely too jaunty and just wrong not only for the scenes but the story itself.

While I do encourage seeing the original story as it aired, the second disk with the enhanced story is a very nice addition. While some of the added scenes somewhat interrupt the flow of the story most of them are really welcome additions. The conflict between Ace and the Brigadier, for example, adds some depth to the story. There are also sequences which help tie the Brig to Morgaine and Ancelyn -- that show the Brig as as old war-horse, who doesn't really like battle but by God when called to fight he will do so with honor... for both the living and the dead.

The enhanced special effects as well as the new sound effects are also helpful. The knights' supposedly futuristic guns which, in the original, only shot silly-looking sparks now have ray beams and many audio effects help fill-in plot holes. the one area I didn't care for it was in one crucial scene where Sylvester McCoy as the Seventh Doctor runs into a battlefield and should to stop the fighting. In the original it is all Sylvester McCoy letting loose with a Shakespearean roar but in the enhanced version an effect is added to McCoy's voice. I much prefer the unadulterated version as the "enhanced" version implies that the Doctor is employing some kind of device or technique to stop the fight where the original makes it clear that the Doctor is doing this just with his sheer personality.

On the whole, even the anti-nuclear message still holds up. While one can still hear some old, Cold War overtones here and there most of the points hold true in our world today. Just as the issues of war and peace and honor also hold true. There is a tribute to the past of the series while looking towards the future, there is charm and excitement and complex characters, great scenes and great dialogue. "Battlefield" is well worth the time.

Dog is Love

So you may have seen me mention fostering a dog. I've been doing some volunteer work whenever I can for a local no-kill shelter. Last Friday a call went out needing a short-term foster home for an older dog trying to recover from a case of Kennel Cough (imagine the WORST cold you've ever had with a runny nose and congestion and coughing and such and imagine you can't even blow your nose and you get some idea of Kennel Cough).

Since the dog was a Jack Russell terrier she didn't really get along with other dogs... or cats for that matter... meaning she had to go to a home without either. I felt sorry for the poor thing and volunteered my place.

So I've had this dog for a week. But the thing is that I underestimated my schedule -- which is crazy for the next several months (at least) and I wasn't aware that the poor dog, in addition to the Kennel Cough, was skin and bones and would need some fattening up.

I also discovered that she hated being crated and wouldn't eat while she was crated. If left alone and uncrated she STILL wouldn't eat without someone there AND she expressed her displeasure at being left alone by pooping in my floor. And trust me, she's capable of holding it she just didn't WANT to.

As a result, she had to be crated during the day but in an effort to fatten her up I was running home at noon on my lunch break and walking her a little bit and feeding her. The problem with this is that then I wasn't getting to eat MY lunch... which was taking a toll on me.

I was only scheduled to keep her for a week but I soon realized there was no way I could extend it any longer than that simply because my schedule wasn't being fair to her. She needed someone in a better situation than me to care for her -- she needed someone who would be home during the day to take care of her and make sure she ate as needed.

Also, she is a sweet dog, really, but she's not the dog I would choose for myself. I liked her but I never really bonded with her so in some ways I have no problems returning her to the shelter... BUT....

I do feel a little bad. I really DO wish I could take care of her better. She's still on the road to recovery from the Kennel Cough but she isn't fully over it yet and she's still thin despite me trying to get her to eat at every opportunity. I wish I could have kept her until she was fully well but I know that, in a way, she won't GET fully well until she's in a situation where she can eat more often.

But at least I HAVE learned something... I know what it's going to take for me to have a dog of my own. I know some of the pitfalls and I know that my current schedule just isn't fair to a poor animal who only wants to love and please.

So, farewell little Genie. I hope you find a good long-term foster home and then I hope you get adopted to someone who will love you and give you the attention you need.

Okay, So I'm Here

I *did* think of something to say.

The group Improv Everywhere staged a Star Wars reenactment on a New York subway recently...



The thing about this is that every year at Chicago Comic Con people who attend the con in costume can be seen riding the el. I once really *did* see a Princess Leia and a phalanx of Stormtroopers getting off the el to head to the con. Of course THEY didn't reenact a scene along with it.

Here's another bit they did, at the request of the New York Public Library... and you know what movie famously featured the New York Public Library, don't you?.....

Bleh

I'm tired, I'm busy as aitch-ee-double toothpicks, I'm a bit stressed around the edges, and it's beastly hot and I keep having to walk the dog I'm fostering.

In short, no time to think up clever little blog posts and no time to work on the next Grab Bag review.

The Grab Bag review is being held up by the fact that this was a relatively recent purchase DVD and I haven't even watched it yet (although I did see it years ago on PBS when I was younger) so I didn't know until I popped the case that this one is actually a double disk set. One disk contains the story as it originally broadcast and one disk contains an 'expanded and enhanced' version (by which I assume it has restored cut scenes and better special effects). So, wanting to give all fairness to the story I want to watch both versions before I write up my review... and I have no time to finish watching it all. So the next Grab Bag review will be a little late. And since I have nothing else to really say.... as my mom always says "Look for me when you see me coming."

Random-Random Day

Because I feel like it...

THIS is why Godzilla is cool...



Because Eddie Izzard is always funny. And Eddie Izzard plus Lego animations are astoundingly silly. Warning: Mild swear word used.



And because a YouTube poster named Babelcolour is freakin' AWESOME!



And just because this is sheer, unadulterated insanity: